November 29, 2015



When we are spent and broken by the trials life throws our way, it feels like ages before we are able to sip at the clarity of life once more. The sad thing is it can be ages. We can wait half a lifetime before saying "I'm sorry", before uttering in defeat "I forgive you", or even whispering in our heads " things happen for a reason". It seldom has to be this way.

I learned early on the only clarity I would see when I'm amidst my newest woe, is the the clarity from complete strangers. Why them? It is because the man who is pushing his daughters stroller is singing to her and she is laughing, the old lady who is feisty and sweet just gave her grand daughter a smile as she snuck a piece of cake, and the man who just got off of work with his shirt looped in his belt just picked a pretty purple flower and smelt it as he held it gently in his rough hands.

These are used matches that helped me to see that things were never going to stay miserable. These remnants of light helped me see past the murk of the dark and straight to the path of a new beginning. I would see each instance of pure beauty and let the happiness from each fill me up inside until I could see that all I would need to do is wait until the opportune moment when it would be safe to breathe life into the air again.


November 28, 2015

Oh Love Stories...


Here we are average people in a world where it's hustle and bustle, survival of the quickest, and time is money. We do what we can to live a decent life, and that idea of "decent" is either filled by delusions of grandeur or a somewhat cynical view of the world. However, there comes a time, a small moment when that changes.

We peer into the mirrored heart of what is history, literature, art, and pure Fiction to find a piece of the fundamental part of our selves. This piece is like a universal key that unlocks the door to our true selves. The key is love stories.

Love stories of every kind whether it be a love of ones people, family, land, life, or lover, these are the keys to our hearts that bring us to the key hole. The key hole is reflection.

When we see the brave Romeo fighting for his Juliet, or Elizabeth Bennett passionately telling off Mr. Darcy, or even Shaun and Liz from "Shaun of the Dead" sharing a smoke when they are presumably inches away from death, we understand the truth, we understand that we are more than our shuffling life's would make us out to be. We have the ability to change the world in one blink, ride starlight into the eyes of our beloved, make darkness tremble in a confused humor, and make the bitter, broken hearts of the world smile with one single happy tear to show Genuinity. But, we have a choice.

We could sit at the key hole all day long, watching from afar as our wildest dreams be played out by figures of history and fiction or we can take that new found medical tape to patch up the parts of our soul that has been withered by doubt and disappointment, and unlock that door to ourselves to find who we tuely are, not who we are expected to be. We can scale the mountain in our hearts by merely floating to the top so we can dive into such pure bliss of Happiness, passion, and the awesome feeling of overcoming what ever challenge life throws at us. We can touch the hearts of people miles and miles between us to spread the word in the simplest of phrases: "you are not alone, we are all so much more than what we seem to be."

Love stories patch the soul.

~Thoughts of a Dreamer~

November 11, 2015

Beauty's Lover, Can It Be Me?


Wanting something, Longing for it deeply, but never receiving is something all have experienced, whether it is as a childish, innocent, Longing, or something with more emotional mass. The reality of getting it is as real as the dreams you have of it. However when it graduates to touch, taste, sound, feel, and sight, we are tested. Are we truly wanting what is presented to us? Will we destroy it? Will we hide it from the rest of the world? Will we become poorer for having it? Will we mistreated it, discard it, and throw it upon the ground and walk away to only feel that deep agonizing regret that forces us to turn around and run back for it? In those instances, will it still be there, or is it gone forever and the regret set in our bones as the deepest bitterness, turning into cancers, fading mobile ability, and nights filled with tears and shouts of an inner pain we really want the painkillers for?
Or, do we hold it and love it as we have always dreamed? Would we sit upon the ground in utter bliss wondering what we did right to deserve such a momentous gift from the blessed essence of love itself? Do we finally feel the contentment with life and start to make something of what we have received?

Or, by all that is right in this world, we receive the longing not fit for us to keep but hold for a while to pass on to the one who has something we so desire to give us?

Moments in my life have lead me to be cautious with what I receive, and make damn sure my heart is in it, for if it isn't, there is no point in even bothering.

~Thoughts of a Dreamer~